So it appears that with this time of year brings a magnitude of emotions. Forgiveness, regret, hope, amongst others. I chose several of those to give me the courage to face the very reason I've become so silent in recent times. Friday night. Through some crazy thought process going on in my head I decided to do my best to make amends with that boy who broke my heart. I went out and bought him a present as a token of renewed friendship. Emotive in sentiment, yet quite fitting I believe. I wasn't sure what was going to happen. I wasn't nervous. I had nothing to lose. I was simply going there with the mere hope that forever doesn't always mean forever. As I scoured his work place it hit me, out of all the bad scenarios that I'd run through my head the one I hadn't thought of was, what if he had a new girlfriend? What if I walked up the stairs and saw them together?

I walked around and couldn't find him. I got a friend to call him to let him know that we were waiting for him and somehow he just casually slipped into the conversation "I'm seeing someone".

WHAT THE FUCK. A mere five weeks ago when he was still all hung up on his ex of two years ago, apparently the thought of a relationship was too much for him to handle. Yet there we were, standing at the door of the Elephant and Wheelbarrow, him telling us he didn't have much time as his girlfriend was picking him up.

This story, it has no moral, it has no point. It just, is. This is how it goes in my life. Yes, poor me, I'm the victim. But really, when is shit going to turn out right for once?

-Jack

< - >

did you miss this?
bittersweet - 2008-07-02
Furious - 2008-02-24
and it only gets shitter from here on in - 2007-10-12
fucked it up well and good - 2005-26-12
Some sort of a resurrection - 2005-05-15